Goodmorning Thailand….

Today I had my first early Thai morning. With all the hustle of flying and time change Ive been sleeping in way too late, but alas this morning I was out of bed at 7:30am before the city became alive (which is pretty early around here). I walked around my area and enjoyed it all from a calm point of view. The streets weren’t full of vendors, hundreds of people, or constant action; nope they were dead…slow.

Believe it or not, traveling can actually be a lot of work. You are always on the move, trying to see this or that, lugging around an extra twenty pounds on your back, and rarely sleeping so you can soak up all the sights. Even on the road I need to remind myself to slow down. This morning after my walk I went to get myself a coffee (looks like I may have to be hitting the caffeine again). As I stood there waiting the man getting my coffee ready looked me in the eye and sternly said “sit down”. Now it could be my active imagination or a lack of sleep but I am almost positive in his two words he actually said to me “why are you standing in front of me and bothering me? Why are you being all impatient and making me hurry? I am going to take my time making you a delicious coffee while you take your time relaxing in my chair and absorbing this beautiful morning. Hunny, you are in one of the most beautiful places on earth, take a breath, take a seat, enjoy the view and RELAX”. And that was all I needed to hear. I sat there on my own soaking up my experiences (even some from the last few weeks that I haven’t taken the time to enjoy enough). As tears came to my eyes I wanted to just sit there and break down, to drop my shoulders and cry. I AM SO BLESSED!!! What happened? How did I get here?

Sometimes it is hard to look at life and just feel blessings. There are times I get caught in my past, or worried about my future and I think “man I got freakin ripped off” and you know what, I did in lots of ways, but so has everyone. Every person I know has their own deep scars embedded into their skin and into their heart. Pain, fear, injustice…it is all part of life and I know it is important to not hold on too but sometimes that takes training, it takes a lot of work. Now don’t get me wrong, Im not a victim and I never have been, but there seems to be this little empty hole somewhere in my heart that is DYING to be filled and it seems like the impossible task. This trip I am going to quit working on filling that hole and focus on filling up the rest of my heart with all my wonderful blessings and maybe, just maybe I can suffocate that hole right out! And today, right now I am blessed beyond measure. No worry in sight, no heavy burdens, no broken spirits…just beauty. Now the trick is standing still, and in this very moment stillness is all I know.

Be blessed…